Hey all - I'm sure you're all wondering why I haven't created any posts in the last few months. The only reason I have is that I haven't really had anything interesting to say. It was a fun summer, and so far its been a fun autumn. Now that its getting colder outside, I'm sure I'm going to have many more lonely nights at home, which will hopefully drive me to spout out some more random thoughts and
jibber jabba.
So, to enlighten all of you trusty readers, I'll reach into my inbox and answer all of those amazing questions you've been sending me. Let's take a look at my inbox:
Oh, geez. Well, I guess I'm not answering any of your fan mail tonight. So, ya know what I'll do -- I'll just have a little Q&A with myself! Let's begin.
Q: Dude, what have you been up to the past few months?
A: Well, I watched my beloved Chicago Cubs finish atop the National League, and they promptly CHOKE in the playoffs. I watched my second favorite team, the Red Sox, stumble into the playoffs and lose to the upstart Tampa Bay Rays. (I
DID watch game 5, and thoroughly enjoyed the entire series -- it was a great battle. I'm disappointed the Sox didn't win, but I'm not distraught.)
I watched Tom Brady go down 10 minutes into the Patriots season. On the other hand, I've watched none other than Kyle
Neckbeard Orton lead the Bears offense like a super star. Is this some kind of bizarro world?
I found my inner nerd and attended the
Ajax Experience conference over in South Boston. Yes, I'm a javascript geek - and yes it was totally friggin awesome. And, in case you're wondering, my javascript library of choice is
Dojo.
Besides all that, I've had plenty of beer, played plenty of
kickball games, had plenty more beer, and a lot of fun.
Q: Dude, that's boring shit. What about you love life? Where are all the ladies?
A: Really? Is that all you care about? You just wanna know whether I've scored?
Q: Yes
A: Well, that's not a question.
Q: I don't care. This isn't Jeopardy. Answer the damn question.
A: Fine. I went on a handful of first dates, but never felt any sort of connection. I did, however, go out with an awesome girl for a few weeks - and had a great time. Again, though, it didn't pan out. I guess I just didn't feel that certain spark, even though it was awesome.
Q: What do you mean you didn't feel that "spark"?
A: Dude, I don't know. I guess my heart just wasn't in it. Ya know what I mean?
Q: No, I don't.
A: Well, there's just that certain feeling, that certain
je ne sais quoi that I'm looking for.
Q: Je ne sais quoi? WTF does that mean?
A: It means you're a shithead. In French.
Q: You're calling me a shithead?
A: Yes.
Q: Dude, you're calling yourself a shithead.
A: That's not a question.
Q: You're the one who's making up these stupid questions!
A: All right, this is getting stupid. I'm having a fake argument with myself in a fake Q&A post.
Q: Fine. One last question: Phillies or Rays?
A: I'm rooting for the Phillies, however I really have no idea who's going to win this series. The Rays are a great team, and it wouldn't surprise me if they won the whole thing.
Well, I've run out of material for this post. However, I think I like the idea of answering random questions. I think I'll start a new "Ask a Bachelor" gimmick. I'm sure, everyone out there is just dying to find out the opinion of a single 30-something bachelor.
So, got any questions? Ask a bachelor. I'll give you the honest bachelor answer.
Oh, geez. Well, I guess I'm not answering any of your fan mail tonight. So, ya know what I'll do -- I'll just have a little Q&A with myself! Let's begin.
Thanks Starbucks! I had to walk around work all afternoon smelling like Frappuccino with a big coffee stain all over the front of my shorts. It's not fun trying to explain to everyone that I didn't pee in my pants - its a friggin Frappuccino stain.
