After months of scouring the Intertubes and the night sky, I've finally discovered Jonathan Papelbon's homeland. I've highlighted it here in this map of the universe.
I know some of his teammates have claimed that he's just a "redneck from Mississippi", but through my extensive research, I've found that story is only a myth. His real home is that distant star. Did you notice that when he threw his glove up in the air after winning game 4, it never came down? That's right - he tossed it back to his family - billions of light years away.
Seriously folks, after watching him Riverdance in his underwear with googles, after throwing 98 mph fastballs, did you really think he was human?
On the other hand, after watching the parade today, I think its really obvious that Papelbon would be the lead singer of some crazy band if he wasn't playing baseball.
I was taught way back in my T-Ball days that when you're catching a popup or a ball in the outfield, you always use 2 hands! Mr. Tacoby just lost 2 points in my book for making that last catch out there with only one hand. Thanks for the free tacos, dude, but catch the ball with proper baseball form!
Update: Mr. Lugo - same goes for you too. TWO HANDS! I really don't want to see you guys drop the ball.... again.
I think it would have been a much better deal for Taco Bell to dish out a free Taco for every double hit by Tacoby Bellsbury. By my count, I deserve at least 4 tacos now!
I'm not ready for the Boston baseball season to be over yet. I wasn't ready for the season to end last Thursday, nor was I ready on Saturday or Sunday. I'm still not ready for baseball to end. I can't describe how excited I am to see more Red Sox baseball this year. For some reason, even though the Sox were down 3 games to 1, I had some strange confidence that they'd be able to come back and take the series. I was really confident they could take game 5 and pretty confident that Schilling could step up for game 6. Game 7, however, was up in the air. I figured it would be a battle - which it was. The breaks seemed to go in favor of the Sox, and Dice-K didn't have his signature bad inning. Then finally, in the 7th and 8th innings, the Sox turned the dial up to 11 and poured it on!
For the past year or so I've noticed that the MBTA has been making minor improvements to the station. There's new lighting down on the platform and new lighting on the mezzanine. Plus, they've fixed up all the escalators, and they all seem to be working now. [Knocks on wood. Did I just break the first rule of Porter Square Escalators? Rule #1: Never talk about the Porter Square Escalators, lest they break.] Plus, they've finally got all the message boards at the platform working again. Hooray.
Yesterday, I noticed that they've added some nice looking signs at the street level exit that direct riders to the 77/96 bus stop and the 83 bus stop. Plus, there's a great local Porter Square map in the mezzanine that shows the bus routes and local streets.
Its nice that they've added these small touches to the station, but were they really necessary? I've always considered the Porter Square station to be in relatively good shape. I'd imagine that the money for those small renovations would have been better spent fixing up the touristy stops. But hey, I just ride the T, I'm not in charge of the capital budget.
Hmmmm..... Maybe a T rider should be in charge of the capital budget??? Nah, that would make sense.
Arrrrgh! I know this stupid song is going to be in my head all night tonight. I've been watching the Rockies try to sweep the Diamondbacks in the background for the past 30 minutes or so, and I heard this really familiar song in the background:
Viva - Viva - Las Vegas!
Unfortunately, I turned to the TV to enjoy the song. To my dismay, [or should I say horror?] it was NOT an advertisement about Las Vegas. NO! NOOOOOOO! There were about 5 old guys playing guitar in some cabin singing
Viva - Viva - Viagra!
Read that again, and sing it in your head. "Viva - Viagra!" Its going to be stuck in your head all day long. And, for the rest of your life, every time you hear the "Viva - Las Vegas" song, you're going to chuckle and think
Viva - Viva - Viagra! Viva - Viva - Viagra!
Don't blame me. Thank your friendly folks at Pfizer.
So, here's the thing with Cleveland's "closer", Joe Borowski.
If we get in the wayback machine and head back to 2003, we'll see that he was a mediocre closer for the Chicago Cubs. Sure, all Cubs fans loved him back in the day, yet it was excruciating to watch him pitch the 9th. Borowski would constantly give up hits, walk people, and get himself into jams. He really wasn't that good of a pitcher, yet he managed to get the job done. He was considered the "working man's" closer - nothing overpowering, yet would pitch himself out of an inning.
Now, he's on the Cleveland Indians.
Now, he pitches even worse than he did on the Cubs.
It is absolutely necessary for the Red Sox to be patient, foul off his junk, and take a walk. His earned run average was way over 4.00, and he had 5 losses to his name this season. There is no reason for the Sox to let him get another post-season save this season. If the Sox can beat Mariano Rivera, facing Joe Borowski should be like facing a little league pitcher.
And one last gripe - if anyone on the Sox should know Borowski, it should be former National Leaguers Lowell and Drew. Lowell saw him many times in the '03 regular season, and again, against the Cubs in the infamous 2003 NLCS. I'm disappointed that the Sox aren't showing enough patience with him.
Has anyone else noticed that about 1/2 the Yankees bullpen is fat ugly dudes who can't pitch? For such a team full of high-priced glamor players, their bullpen looks like a bunch of guys that were eating steak and eggs at the roadside truck stop yesterday. Let's look a little closer:
Chris Britton Height: 6'3" Weight: 280 Fat AND Ugly Comment: Last week, I think this dude was selling used cars in Somerville just across the street from the Target on Somerville Avenue. I'd venture to say the Burger King Quadruple Stacker was his daily lunch. You suck.
Brian Bruney Height: 6'3" Weight: 245 Fat AND Ugly Comment: I swear, this guy was making Peanut Buster Parfaits at Dairy Queen last summer. At the end of his shift, he'd eat all the soft-serve ice cream left in the machines. You Suck.
Ron Villone Height: 6'3" Weight: 245 Normal, but still Fat Birthplace: Englewood, NJ Comment: Way, way, wayyy too much pasta and cannolis. You suck.
Mike Myers Height: 6'3" Weight: 225 Birthplace: Arlington Heights, IL Funny looking, still Fat Comment: Dude, lay off the Old Styles and Hot Dogs. Just because you enjoyed Mr. Submarine doesn't mean you can throw the submarine pitch. You suck.
Since there's no Red Sox on tonight, and the Paw Sox are getting their ass kicked by Columbus, I figured I'd check out this "Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader" show on Fox. Do we really need a game show on TV to prove just how stupid some people can be? ARGH.
The first question I saw was in the category "4th Grade Math". The Question (its a tough one):
How many perfect squares are there between the numbers 10 and 20?
The contestant had to think really hard about that one. She did answer "1", thank goodness, (16 is the only perfect square: 4x4=16), but her husband in the audience was convinced she was wrong. He told her that 12 was a perfect square too!
C'mon people! COME ON! Please don't make me throw a shoe through my TV because you don't know what a perfect square is! PLEASE!
I'll have to admit, one of the reasons we all went out to Pittsburgh this past week was to visit the Harris Grill. On Tuesday nights, they serve up FREE BACON at the bar. About every 30 minutes or so, the bartender would bring out baskets of bacon and just hand them out to anyone with their hand stretched out. Besides that, they've got a great selection of beers, and great appetizers.
I must ask, why is there not a bar in Boston / Cambridge / Somerville that will serve up free bacon for a Tuesday "happy hour"? Bacon and beer seriously go hand-in-hand. My cholesterol level may be about 20 points higher now.
A few years ago we all headed out to Chicago to visit The Prodigal Son, for the same reason. Every Wednesday, they served up free bacon to patrons. Unfortunately, the bar is no more - it was lost in a fire. And yes, it was a grease fire.
So, while most people want to travel the United States to see all of the wonderful historical sites and national parks, I'm on a quest to travel the country and visit bars that serve up free bacon. Rumor has it, there's a bar in Texas that has Country Fried Bacon. Man, I'm hungry.
Last week in Pittsburgh, I was able to catch 2 Cubs wins in one day -- and I didn't attend a double-header. How can that be? Well I'll gladly let you know.
On Tuesday night, in the top of the 7th inning, the Cubs scored 4 runs to take the lead over the Pirates, 6-5 (thanks to a Cliff Floyd bomb into the Allegheny River). In the bottom of the seventh, with one out, and the count at 1 ball and 2 strikes, the skies opened up and the umpires delayed the game. After 2 hours, they suspended the game - it would be resumed the following day. I had never heard of this situation before.
Apparently, there's a new MLB rule this season regarding suspended games - 4.12 (a). To paraphrase, if the visiting team scores 1 or more runs in the top half of the inning to take the lead in the game, and the game is delayed or postponed due to weather in the bottom half of the inning, the game will be suspended and resumed at the next meeting.
This was great news for Cub fans. In the past, if a game was called in the bottom half of the inning, the score would resort to the score at the end of the previous inning, and the game would be called. So, if this game had happened last year, the Cubs would have lost the game. With the new rule, they resumed the game the next day, at the exact point it was suspended!
My buddies and I had tickets to the Wednesday game, so we got to see the final 2 1/2 innings of the previous game, plus the full scheduled game, all for the low low PNC Park price of $26.00. Oh yeah, the seats were 2 rows from the field too. And even better, the Cubs won BOTH games. Maybe I was too hard on them in my earlier post. Ever since I ranted and decided to put my faith in the Red Sox, the Cubs have gone 8-3, have a 5 game winning streak, and are back up to 2nd place in the NL Central. Although, I'm still not convinced it will last. I hope I'm proven wrong.
Sure, I was really hoping for a sweep of the Yankees this past weekend. I think 2 straight series sweeps of the Yankees would make up for the 4 game sweep the Yankees pulled on the Sox last year. But hey, 5 out of the first 6 is great news. Thanks Yankee's bullpen!
In other news, I was really looking forward to seeing the Cubs play the Cardinals on ESPN. Its not very often I get to see the Cubs on TV out here. Unfortunately, one of the Cardinals pitchers, Josh Hancock, was tragically killed in a car accident last night, so the game has been postponed. He was only 29 years old, one year younger than me - and he pitched 3 innings in Saturday's Cubs / Cardinals game. He actually made his major league debut with the Red Sox back in 2002 (he retired the first 6 ML batters he faced). Another strange fact - this is the second Cubs / Cardinals game that has been postponed due to a player's death in the past 5 years. Back in 2002, a game at Wrigley was postponed due to the death of Darryl Kile.
At Fenway, is it expected that home runs hit by the opposing team should be thrown back into the field?
I ask, because being a Cubs fan, home runs hit by the opponents MUST be thrown back into the field. You'll even see people out on Waveland or Sheffield who catch a ball launch it back INTO the park. Fans who don't throw it back risk loud ridicule, beer showers, and bombardment by empty beer cups. (I don't think Wrigley Bleacher Bums are savvy - or sober - enough to throw a slice of pizza, they're too busy eating hot dogs and drinking Old Style. However, after the 4/16 Fenway pizza incident, are slices of Connie's Deep Dish in play? Man, that would hurt.)
For years, I've been somewhat of a fair-weathered Red Sox fan. My true allegiance is to the hopeless Chicago Cubs. I really love the Cubs, but as usual, they're in the basement of the NL Central. That's the same place they ended last season. You'd think with a lineup of Soriano, Lee, Ramirez, and Barrett with Zambrano, Marquis, Lilly, Hill, Prior, and Wood on the mound the Cubs would be unstoppable. Of course though, they don't get the clutch hits and their bullpen routinely blows games. Some things never change. I'm going to join Cubs Anonymous and follow the 12-step program to rid myself of the pain associated with my obsessive behavior in yearning for a winner.
This season, though, a strange thing happened to me. I've finally found myself seriously rooting for the Red Sox and actually caring about the outcome of the game. I actually want them to win for once. Being a Cubs fan, I've always been jealous of the Red Sox and the team's success. But I've finally realized that the Cubs really do stink - and I've been able to appreciate the talent of the Red Sox.
When the Sox are down a few runs, I expect them to mount a comeback and win the game, and they do. When the Sox are winning in the 9th inning, I expect the bullpen to save the game, and they do. My feelings for the Cubs are exactly the opposite. When they're down a few runs, I expect them to lose, and they do. When the Cubs are winning late in the game, I expect the bullpen to blow the game, and they do. Its just no fun rooting for the Cubs. I'm tired of it. However, I still won't give up on them - there's still a little bit of optimism left that they'll get it together and put together a winning season.
It all came together for me this past Friday. I was out at the People's Republik with my buddy watching the Sox / Yankees game. When the Sox put up 5 runs on Rivera in the bottom of the 8th, I think I was one of the loudest people cheering in the bar. My buddy told me that he'd never heard me cheer that loudly for the Red Sox. It feels great to cheer for a great team. Plus, tonight - seeing back to back to back to back home runs solidified my Red Sox fandom.
The other thing that finally hooked me was actually listening to Remy and Orsillo call a game on NESN. They're a great duo up in the booth. (As good as they are, I still miss watching the Cubs on WGN listening to Steve Stone and Harry Caray calling a game.) It was the pizza incident last Monday that made me realize just how great Remy and Orsillo are. I know its last week's news, and its already been blogged over at Deadspin, but I absolutely love the play-by-play of the April 16th pizza incident. Every time I watch this clip, I still find myself laughing out loud. Its stuff like this that's really pulling me into Red Sox Nation.
So, Red Sox Nation, do you have room for one more fan? Please? I think I'm hooked.
P.S. - I love Fenway, but Wrigley is still better.
HOLY CRAP! Is this some sort of a MLB record? Back to back to back to back home runs. I need to stop making blog posts about the game! Because as soon as I make one, I have to update it!
I've totally neglected my blog here. I'm not sure if its writer's block, or if I've just been too busy. Its strange - I think about posting my random thoughts here pretty much every day. Yet, in the end, I don't.
Tonight's beer is a delicious Scottish Style ale IN A CAN! Its called Old Chub and is from the Oskar Blues Brewery in Colorado. Its not just any can, its a totally cool looking can. Yeah, I'll admit it - I bought it because the can looks cool, but its also got a totally cool name. (but the beer is excellent too).
In my previous post, I ended up searching for "Dean's Home Furniture" to see if I could find some sort of link to the furniture chain's old TV commercials or tag line. Lo-and-behold, they don't exist anymore, and my quick search turned up almost nothing.
So, in my infinite wisdom, I scoured the web for some old TV commercials from my homeland, back in flyover country. All I can say is that I struck GOLD!
The jingle for this first commercial has been implanted in my brain since I first started watching cartoons on TV. To make things better, one of the funniest local TV hosts appears.
I'm pretty sure there's not many people that read this part-time blog of mine, but I will personally buy a beer for the first person who can name the comedian in this commercial. (I'll take his real name, or the name of the TV show he hosted. 2 Beers if you can get both).
As soon I blog about slow zones on the Red Line, they seem to be corrected! Over the past week, I've noticed that the T has finally fixed the rail problems northbound between Harvard and Porter. It seems to me that the trains are back up to speed, instead of crawling along at 6 m.p.h. until halfway to Porter.
In addition, it seems the T has fixed the rails just outside of Harvard heading toward Central Square. For about the past 2 years the trains have crawled up the incline out of Harvard up to the crossover. Finally, though, we have been relieved. It probably saves a total of 30 seconds of commute time, but it feels so much faster.
One question remains though: Now that trains are back up to speed, will we see a return of the advertisement along the wall heading towards Central?
As they once pronounced on the ad for Dean's Home Furniture: "I Doubt It!"
[I found one Youtube link for Dean's Home Furniture, but its missing the good ole "I Doubt It!" audio. Apparently they were a shady, scamming furniture chain and closed shop in 2003. No wonder I haven't seen the commercial in years!]
This is neither a rant, nor a rave about the Red Line. For a lack of better terms , I'll call this an Info-Post.
If you're a regular rider of the Red Line between Harvard and Porter, you've probably noticed that the T crawls along the tracks at 6 m.p.h. just outside of Harvard northbound to Alewife. I think they may have found some fractures in the rail and have reduced the speed to prevent further damage. In the subway section between Harvard and Alewife, the rails are bound to concrete, instead of your typical wooden ties. As a result, its a bit more cumbersome to replace the rails than the rest of the Red Line.
On the other hand, there have been a number of slow zones lifted from the Red Line! Over in my neck of the woods, inbound trains are back to 50 mph between Central and Kendall, plus the Longfellow Bridge limit has been raised back to 40 mph. Plus, south siders can enjoy a 50 mph ride between JFK and North Quincy.
Many thanks to my fellow railroad pals posting on this thread over at railroad.net for the info.
This morning, Thursday, it seemed as if the MBTA was on some sort of "surge" of its own - a maintenance spree at Porter Station. There were about 5 trucks parked all around the sidewalk and there were about 10-15 people working on random things. In my disbelief, I saw:
2 escalators actively being repaired
4 fare gates actively being cleaned and repaired
Installation of a new 360 degree security camera
On my return home tonight, the middle escalator was still turned off, but ALL the faregates were working and there is a new Vegas-style security camera overlooking the entire mezzanine.
One question remains: will the camera actually be connected to anything? Or, in classic MBTA style, will it be purely for show?
I'll admit it - I'm convinced they're actually going to use it and monitor it. In the past few weeks, thanks to the security cameras, we've discovered a former T employee cashing in tokens for CharlieTickets and we've had suspects in the Back Bay Station stabbings apprehended.
Wow. That's 2 recent posts from me praising the T. I feel great!
One of my co-workers who lives in Porter Square let me know today that someone broke into his apartment last night. Apparently there was a "rash of break-ins" yesterday on the Cambridge side of the commuter rail tracks. So be on the lookout - and LOCK YOUR DOORS.
Just hearing that has kinda put me on edge all day today. Its one of those events that I'm constantly worried about. I've always thought that the Porter area is generally pretty safe. One of the reasons I moved from Boston over to Porter Square was the crime rate in Boston steadily rose over the 7 years I lived there.
So, after a bit of searching today, I found some links to the Cambridge and Somerville Police Logs.
I don't really read any of the local papers, so I don't keep up with the local happenings. Its really kinda sobering to read these logs and see all the arrests, robberies, and break-ins that happen -- especially when they happen right down the street from your own apartment!
This is just a reminder for me not to fall into a false sense of security. Make sure valuables are hidden and you've got renter's insurance.
Anyways, I need a beer now.... Well whaddya know - its Wednesday - and Wednesdays are for drinkin' at the People's. How convenient.
Thank goodness my company has VPN and allows its employees to work from home. I was still hit hard by my cold this morning - but I was suffering from cabin fever and really wanted to go into work. However, I stepped outside, and thought better of myself. I decided to stay in the warmth of my apartment, drink some more OJ and tea, and work from home. I felt awful for not going into the office - we're hitting crunch time on our project. But, its really best I didn't go in -- there's no reason for me to get more people sick. This cold has been going around the office for the past week, and we had a few more people drop off today too.
So, after all my verbosity above, my point is that I'm having a few more glasses of my Bushmill's tonight. Sure, I'm getting a little hammered, but I feel 10 times better than I did this morning, and 100 times better than I did yesterday.
I'm convinced that the best way to beat a cold is to get some old-fashioned rest, and some glasses of some old-fashioned whiskey. Lemme tell ya, it does the trick.
... did you know that they were closed last Tuesday for the filming of a movie? How awesome is that!
Seriously - there's a new movie in the works called 21. Its the story of one of the MIT Blackjack teams that took Vegas for millions of dollars.
How cool is it that my favorite bar will be front-and-center in a movie?!?!
I rolled by the People's after work on the day of the filming, but I think they were pretty much finished. There were tons of trucks around and wired running all over the place, plus some random tents set up in the driveway next door and the adjacent apartment building. I was kinda hoping that they'd pick one of their regular patrons to be an extra (I'm a pro at hanging out in a bar drinking beer). But hey, no dice. They've got professional extras for that stuff.
The good thing is that they didn't change anything at all in the bar, except for one small thing: the digital clock has been replaced with a neon red hammer and sickle clock. I was worried that the movie set people would have screwed everything up. Thank goodness, its still the same old People's.
Last Friday I took the T from Kendall one stop over to Central to meet up over at my favorite watering hole - The People's Republik. Unfortunately, when I arrived at Kendall, I had a feeling that this could be a long ride - there were already tons of people waiting on the platform. There were no robo-voice delay announcements, so I figured it was a typical slow train.
After waiting for about 15 minutes and watching 3 trains go by in the other direction, I finally heard Mr. Robo-Voice begin to announce "Attention Passengers: The... next red line train to Alewife..." So, I eagerly stood up and squeezed toward the platform edge.
But then, Mr. Robo-Voice didn't complete his sentence with his usual "...is now arriving." Instead, he actually said something rather astonishing - "...will not stop. Please stand behind the yellow line." I was shocked! Mr. All-Knowing-Robo-Voice actually knew the next train was expressed to Harvard and wouldn't stop at Kendall. Sure enough, the next train was jam-packed and meandered through the station without stopping. And, to my delight, the operator didn't blare his horn once on his trip through the station!
All my disgust for the T delaying my trip to the bar vanished. Thanks Mr. Robo-Voice - you made my day. I've never been so pleased to be delayed be the T.
No, I'm not complaining about the weather - that's way too easy. (Granted, it is wicked windy and cold outside). I'm annoyed that I've caught a wicked cold. It hit me pretty bad on Saturday, and I was pretty much out of commission on Sunday, so I tried to go into work this morning. What a mistake.
I was there for about an hour and promptly headed back home. I think I just had some cabin fever and needed to get out of my apartment, and be around some REAL people.
My office is completely open, so if one person gets a cold, everyone's getting it. Hence, I got it too. I did work from home this afternoon, so I'm finally feeling a little better. I've had a gallon of OJ today and about 1/2 bag of cough drops. But, now I'm onto my final cure-all: a few glasses of Bushmill's Irish Whiskey. Sometimes a good glass (or 2 or 3) of whiskey will kick the cold. We'll find out tomorrow! Cheers!
So, we had a little bit more snow this morning. The temperature was above freezing, which made for some heavy, watery snow. The streets pretty much stayed clear the whole day, and we probably had only about an inch or two of accumulation.
After work, I had to shovel the sidewalk in front of the building. There wasn't that much snow, but so many people had walked through it, that shovelling it all was quite a chore. It was so compact in the middle that I couldn't get the shovel to wedge underneath it. Ugh. If only my neighbors had taken 5 minutes to do a rudimentary shovel, all would have been fine. But no. I swear I'm the only one who ever shovels the snow!
I don't mind shovelling too much -- I grew up in the midwest so I'm used to shovelling.
While just about every normal person, and every single one of my friends had President's Day off, I had the good fortune of having to go into the office today. However, I did have the misfortune of having to take the Red Line to work today with the T's weekend diversion between Broadway and Ashmont still in place.
I don't want to bitch too much about the T service (that's too easy), but I will gripe a bit. The one thing I don't understand is why does the T insist on running only 4 car trains when they have diversions in place? Just because today was President's Day, doesn't mean the passenger count falls through the floor. Why not run 6-car trains? The train I took home from Kendall was packed to the gills. There was no reason for that to happen. Add 2 more cars to the train and there would have been plenty of room. Every time I've taken the Red Line on one of their diversion or bus bridge weekends they've run 4-car trains and they've always been packed even more than a normal rush hour train. I know that, other regular riders know that, and so do the operators, conductors, and dispatchers.
I'll accept that there's a good reason for running shorter trains. I'm pretty sure that the T stores the trains on the stub tracks that continue beyond Alewife station. Maybe they're too small to store 6-car trains. Or, if that's not the case, I'll accept that they run shorter trains so they're easier to crossover to the opposite track at the short end of the diversion. HOWEVER - if you're going to run shorter trains, run MORE OF THEM. The headways between the trains were longer than typical Saturday service, and there were more passengers today than on a typical Saturday.
The thing that really annoys me the most, is that train overcrowding today was such a foreseeable problem, and the solution was so incredibly simple. I just don't understand why the folks over at the T managed to let this happen.
In fact, that's probably my biggest gripe ever with the T - so many of the problems with the T are not intractable. They're all solvable - and the solutions are incredibly simple!
I know its winter, and we always have a yearly cold spell, so I really don't like to complain about the weather too much. Plus, I know that Kendall Square is a wind tunnel - especially right around the building at One Broadway.
But today: MAN - Kendall was a WIND TUNNEL!!! I had to trudge through an oncoming 40mph wind. It wasn't 40mph gusts, it was a constant stream of 40mph wind. I could barely walk. That's what I call ridiculous.
A few years ago, I was taking the Red Line from Davis back into Boston and saw some guy get on at Harvard wearing a black trenchcoat, a red shirt, a pair of jeans, and some Vans. So, of course, my first though is - are you some sort of vampire?
Once the train made it through the slow curve, he stood up, grabbed the long bar near the ceiling that runs parallel to the seats and started to do some gymnastics. Then, he somehow hooked the back of his knees over the top of the bar and hung upside-down for the entire trip to Park Street. He was hanging from the bar like a vampire!
Everyone in the car kept looking at him, then looking around not sure whether to ignore him, laugh, or be scared. After we pulled into Kendall and saw him swing a bit and hang on as we rumbled over the switches before the station, the consensus of the subway car was amazement and amusment.
I've looked at the amount of clearance between the bar and the roof of the car, and its only a few inches. So somehow, this guy managed to get his shoes and legs through that space and hang there for the trip from Harvard to Park. That not only takes some serious strength, but also some really REALLY skinny legs. Plus, how can you hang that long and deal with all the blood rushing to your head?
In typical Boston fashion, no one said a word to this kid, and everyone whispered and snickered to their friends. I'll never forget, when we hit MGH, some guy got on and did a double take and nearly fell over when he noticed this guy. But, at that time, all of us in the car were used to the situation and satisfied with it, and looked at our new passenger with the "What's the big deal? So there's a guy hanging from the bar. Deal with it" type attitude.
As we rolled into Park Street, he successfully flipped himself down, took a bow, and got off the train. At that point, I knew I'd have a story for the ages.
My plan is to start posting regularly about the random goings on I see on the T every day. I've been taking the T all around Boston for over 10 years now, so I think I have a pretty good idea of the ins and outs of the system. I've seen some crazy shit over the years, and some wonderful things over the years. Hopefully you'll be able to relate or get a chuckle out of my random musings.
Also, I'm, well, a train geek. You won't find Maxim or Blender in my shitter readings. (They used to be there, but I've pretty much outgrown them) My shitter rack is stacked with Trains magazine. So, I understand how the whole subway system works - not only from a rider's point of view, but also a conductor's or operator's point of view.
I forgot to tell all you loyal readers (you exist, right?) -- the Hardware store in Porter Square had a sign on the door letting all of us Porterites know that Ice Melt will arrive on Monday! Hooray!
(I'm still hoarding about 1/4 of a bucket - and you can't have it)
I've recently gotten hooked on this great show on A&E called The First 48. Its a reality show where cameras follow around homicide investigations during the first 48 hours after the crime. Lemme tell ya - its damn cool.
I really like living over here in Porter Square. The shopping center has pretty much everthing I need - Shaw's, Ace Hardware, and of course, Liquor World (my favorite).
Man, I am such a bachelor. I went out to Ace today and bought a bucket, a mop, and some hardwood floor cleaner. When I moved over here I left all my cleaning stuff at my old apartment and finally got around to getting some new cleaning supplies. Thanks to my New Year's Party, the NFL playoffs, and my Superbowl party, my floors are filthy. I knew it was time to finally clean the floor when I was walking around in my socks and they were sticking to the floor everywhere.
I don't currently have a girlfriend, so there's no motivation for me to keep my place spic and span. That's a pretty sad statement, isn't it?
Well, enough blogging for now. Time to keep on moppin'.
Yeah, its Saturday night and I'm sitting on my laptop, watching Jackass, instead of being out and about on the town. So, did I hear you ask, "Why?" Well, if you'd read me previous post, maybe you'd know.
Its the damn ice. Last night when I slipped, I think I bashed my knee on the ice. I didn't feel anything at the time at all. I walked down to Central and got a cab back to Porter - and even walked back to my place too.
For some reason, I ended up falling alseep on my sofa watching a movie (can't remember what movie it was - too hammered maybe?) and woke up around 6:00am with my right leg in total pain. I totally sprained my knee with the slip on the ice last night - and I've been limping around my apartment all day long. I can barely walk. Hence, I'm staying in tonight, with my good friend - 12 year MacAllan Single Malt Scotch. I had to hobble down to the liquor store in Porter, so I figured I'd splurge and celebrate my walking accomplishment.
Now, on my 3rd glass, the knee is feeling much much better. So, its probably nothing bad at all. No need to go see the doctor.
P.S. - picked up another Smokey Joe from White Hen, and it was, as usual, absolutely delicious.
Its been awhile, be we all finally went back to J.J. Foley's Friday night. What a great bar. We've been going there for close to 7 years now - and its still the same great place. Mr. Foley was there again, and very welcoming and tolerant of our innocent drunkenness.
We all met up after work - around 6:30 or 7:00 and the bar was packed. There are so many of those financial type people who crowd the place and drink crap like Coors Light. The good thing is, they usually clear out by 8:00pm - since they're all a bunch of wussbags.
My plan was to have some after-work Guinness (the Guinness at Foley's is the BEST in Boston) and then head home early and get a good night's sleep. Oh - was I wrong. Every time I tried to leave, my friends got me another beer and made me stay. Its so easy to get me to cave into peer pressure for one more beer --- it's Friday night -- why not one more beer? So, around 12:30 and about 6, or 8 Guinness, we finally managed to leave.
And so, the night ended, correct? No friggin way. You and I know that when Friday night gets started it doesn't end. So, in our infinite wisdom, a few of us took a cab back to (guess where....) the People's for a nightcap. Finally, just before 2:00am and about 10 beers (rought estimate) into the night, I finally started my journey home. And this is where the follies begin.
1) Walking to get a cab, I slipped on the ice and sprained my knee 2) Left my gloves in the cab 3) Couldn't find the correct key to open the front door to my apartment building, so I walked up the iced over driveway to pee behind the building
Uh, some kitchen designer just said that he was excited to take on a project because it was a "difficult, but challenging" project.
I like Hot Pockets because they're "easy, but simple" to cook. I like to watch movies because they're "fun, but entertaining" to watch. I like beer because it gets me "drunk, but hammered"
WTF? Its almost 1:30 AM and I'm writing messages to the Intertubes with HGTV on in the background.
I think I know why - I hit the "formerly known as White Hen" White Hen in Porter and got a Smokey Joe sandwich for dinner. That's why all the rum I've been drinking tonight is not getting me hammered or tired.
I shake my fist at you Smokey Joe Sandwich. I shake my fist at you!!!
For the record: Yes, I am still old school and have a land line. Why? I just want one. So shut up.
There are 5, yes FIVE, messages on my answering machine, all from "Boston, City of", according to my caller ID. They're all concerning parking, snow stuff, school closings, and unexcused absences from my 2 daughters.
Here's why that's funny -- I don't live in Boston and I DON'T HAVE ANY KIDS. Heck, I've never been married and I can't even find a girlfriend!
Please, "Boston, City of", STOP CALLING ME!!!! I've already got my home phone on the do not call list. Should I report you, Mr. "Boston, City of" as a telemarketer? Maybe that'll get you to STOP!
As usual, Wednesday night was spent at the People's over in Central Square. The usual crew was out. For most of us, nothing short of a nuclear holocaust will keep us from heading out to the bar.
And, of course, my dart team, J^2 failed to show up yet again. We had one great game a couple of weeks ago, and convinced ourselves that we are the best in the game. Except, we've never been able to 8-peat, 3-peat, or even re-peat. Maybe it was the 4 beers we had before we started playing... and the 2 more beers during the game. Or was it the shot of B&B. (No, that was after the game).
So, on to the follies -- Have you ever had B&B before? Its not meant to be a shot. Its really an after dinner cognac style drink. For some reason, one of my buddies thinks its the greatest shot in the world. Most bars around Boston don't even have the drink. The People's has it, but every time the bartender brings down the bottle for a shot, there's a layer of dust on it. I think we're the only ones who actually drink the crap.
This past Wednesday was Valentine's day, and one of our random (really cute female) friends showed up who had recently broken up with her boyfriend. To make things better, it was her birthday too! So how do you celebrate a St. Valentine's Day Birthday with a really awesome girl???
You guessed it - B&B shots. Oh so tasty. Well, she (and her friend) didn't think so and could barely keep the shit down. How do you keep from hurling a B&B shot? Have smoke outside in the rain, ice, sleet, blizzard crap. Seriously. Works like a charm.
The downside, I think that shot killed all my charm, and I pretty much turned into a drunken, bluthering idiot. Perfection. I can barely remember the T ride home to Porter.
So kids, what lesson did we learn today? B&B shots rule! And chicks that will do B&B shots rule even more.
I've got this nifty new wiz-bang blog thingey, but I really don't know what to write about. The only thing that's on my mind right now is the stupid weather! I tried to shovel what I could of the sidewalk last night, but alas, it was absolutely 100% frozen solid. I mean ridiculously frozen! The ice melt stuff won't even work on it. My neighbors in my building tried to shovel a little, but the precipitation turned into rain and now there's a 1 inch slab of ice on the sidewalk.
All I can say is - Global Warming? Yeah right.
I don't really mind the snow so much, but I absolutely detest whatever that junk was that fell from the sky yesterday. Was it snow? Was it rain? Was it sleet? Was it ice? Simply ridiculous.
Hopefully we'll get some sun tomorrow and some of the ice on the sidewalks will melt. I usually try to keep the sidewalk clear in front of my apartment building, but there was just no way I could do that yesterday, considering it started to freeze before the storm was even finished. Also, pretty much no one around Porter Square has their sidewalk shoveled. I think the Tru Value hardware store is sold out of ice melt too. Hooray.
The snow has finally started to fall. Maybe the weatherman was actually correct for once? I mean, how many times have they predicted a huge snowstorm in Boston and we've gotten absolutely NOTHING? We'll see what's on the ground in the morning.
So, I'm sitting here, waiting for the snowstorm (which I'm convinced won't show up) and figured, "hey, why not start a blog?" -- so here you have it. I'm officially the bachelor in Porter Square blogger. I've been living out here in Boston for about 10 years now, I take the T to work everyday, and I'm out at a bar around 3 (or 4 or 5) nights a week, so I think I have some sort of perspective as to what goes on out here in the "Hub of the Universe". (I hate that phrase) I'm a native midwesterner, so hopefully I'll be able to provide some sort of unique insight into the goings-on of the Boston scene.
So, hopefully, inbetween being lazy and procrastinating, I'll make some interesting postings here and provide some interesting links. And even better- someone might actually read this! If you suddenly see a rash of postings on Wednesday, then you'll know we actually got a snowstorm and I'm "working from home." (heh - do people actually do work at home when they say they're working at home??) I'm no Instapundit, so I won't be updating this blog via my cell phone while waiting at a red light in my hybrid SUV on my way to teach law school. I'm more likely to post something while I'm bored at work, or if I find myself drunk at home with nothing to do.
After months of scouring the Intertubes and the night sky, I've finally discovered Jonathan Papelbon's homeland. I've highlighted it here in this map of the universe.
